I signed up for an online dating service for singles over 50. Coincidentally, my future husband, Mark, had registered for a different service, and the two companies had merged several years earlier.

I received ‘likes’ from various people: some were nice, a few were slightly weird, and some were no-goes.  Online dating isn’t easy; like any venture into Stranger Danger Land, it can be scary and discouraging. At my age, I was already feeling disheartened.  

One of the nice fellows was my future husband, Mark.

After exchanging a few non-committal messages, Mark took a Hail Mary of his own. He mentioned that he would be in my town that Friday for a meeting and asked if I would like to meet for dinner or drinks. He was very polite and said he would understand if I thought it was too soon or felt uncomfortable.


I had already accepted the idea that God had said no, and I would be fine alone. I texted Mark to let him know I was working in my yard that day and might be able to stop by briefly, but I would let him know later.

I spent the entire day wrestling with God about how I didn’t want to go. I was fed up with the first date “job interview with sexual harassment at the end” scene—tired of getting my hopes up and tired of feeling disappointed. I was exhausted from making small talk and from being polite in general. 

I reminded Him (several times) that I was OK alone.




Later that afternoon, I felt exhausted and drained by the heat and mental wrestling. I told God again that I didn’t want to go, but I would if He wanted me to.


Here’s where it gets strange. I kept feeling little nudges: “Go take a shower.”
I did, but I kept telling Him I didn’t want to go. Then, as I stood in my closet looking for something to wear, I couldn’t think of anything I liked (you women know that feeling). I said, “Lord, if you want me to go, you’ll have to find me something to wear.” My arms reached out, and I pulled out an outfit. I liked it—nothing fancy, just simple and comfortable, but not frumpy. Plus, I could wear comfy shoes! Alright. I ran out of excuses.

Another important point: I kept hearing, “Dress like a wife.” Weird, I know.  And yes, I figured I was addled-headed from all the yardwork in the sun. But it happened.

It was around 8 pm when I texted Mark to let him know I would be coming, but I could only stay for a short while, keeping my options open to leave if necessary. While driving to the restaurant, I kept negotiating with God that I wouldn’t expect much beyond the usual scenario of figuring out how soon I could politely leave. I asked Him if it wasn’t meant to be, at least let Mark be a nice guy with whom I could chat and enjoy a pleasant evening.


And if it didn’t work out, maybe he would have a friend (like the old Fabergé shampoo commercial, “I told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on and so on”). As I mentioned, this was my Hail Mary.

I walked through the back door. At the bar, a tall man with broad shoulders, dressed in a dark blue shirt, had his back turned to me. I tapped him on the shoulder, and he turned around. We both smiled immediately.

We talked and laughed nonstop for over two hours.




On my way home, I texted a friend that something in the Universe had changed.  I had found ‘the guy.’  Mark mentioned that he had done the same thing that night. 

It was April 15, and we were engaged May 27.
  We were married in September. 

The Bible says: “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecclesiastes 4:12)

I have experienced the “one” part for 60 years and made many mistakes as the sole decision-maker. I do not recommend it, at least not for me. 

I’ve also experienced the three-part aspect, which is the most surprising and miraculous.

It’s God.

Marriage is a covenant between man and woman, yes, but also with God. I had no idea.

God is good. 

And He hasn’t forgotten any of us.